The Genie's Cat
by mat528
Summary: A scheming blackmailer runs afoul of another magic maid.


THE GENIE'S CAT

**A/N: ****This is AU, in that the Bewitched adversary never ran into anyone in IDOJ. This story presumes that the reader has seen the second season two part story "Follow That Witch". In it, a private detective tries to unsuccessfully gain riches after threatening Samantha.**

**Timeframe: Season Three of IDOJ; Season Four of Bewitched**

**Disclaimer: I don't own IDOJ or Bewitched. IDOJ belongs to Sidney Sheldon's estate; Screen Gems, and Columbia, and so does Bewitched. I am making no money off of this story. It is purely for fun and no one blinked or twitched their nose to give me any profit. No infringement is intended.**

When he finally reached the good U. S. of A., Charlie Leach kissed the ground, earning some stares from passersby.

"Go on!" He said in his usual hoarse voice. "You've never seen a person kissin' the ground before?"

One middle aged woman took a look at the gruff, scruffy looking former private eye. She huffed, thinking, 'Boy, this town sure gets all the screwballs!'

He didn't know or not if he was anywhere near where the witch lady lived. Looking around, he could see that the town he was in wasn't full of the smaller, brick houses and wooden houses that Morning Glory Circle in Westport, Connecticut was known for. Instead, houses were mostly singular levels. Some had two levels, but no more than that. A lot had lattice work in front of the windows, and ivy growing on the white wooden squares.

Like Westport, this place, which was picturesque in its own right, was one of the first to try something new: planned community housing. Charlie thought about Samantha Stevens wondering in the two years it had taken for him to get the money to travel back to the States if she'd moved.

No matter, he decided. He would find a way to track her down all over again, and then he would have all the treasures she could lay on him. Charlie just had to find a new angle. He just had to reveal his shiny new rhetorical ace and threaten her with it.

But, first things first. Leach wanted more than anything to touch base with Charmaine, his wife. Of course, like most of the schemes in his misspent life, when he'd first tried to contact her, that idea had been a disaster.

(A year and a half ago…)

When Charlie finally had gotten a job, he'd tried to reach the platinum blonde bombshell he'd said "I do" to, but he had only saved enough to make one long distance call. He had finally reached her, but when he'd talked about getting even, Charmaine had screeched in her high voice,

"You an' your crazy talk! That's it, Charlie! I'm taking myself outta here until you get some _help!_"

Charlie had panicked. Deep down, he loved his wife, even if she did think he was crazy. Desperate, he cajoled, "Aww, Charmaine, don't be like that. I want you more than anything. That's why I'm—" he paused as he thought about where he was. He'd gotten enough to reach her _one_ time, but what then? How would he get back to the States on the mere pittance of a salary he had courtesy of the Mexican government?

Trying again, he lied, telling his spouse of eleven years, "—in...the deep South, where I'm working on a long term assignment."

XXXXXXXXXXX

In their small apartment in the City of Westport, Charmaine narrowed her eyes with suspicion. Gripping the phone tighter, she asked, "Charlie, you're _really _on a case? Please tell me you're not on some crazy witch hunt again?"

XXXXXXXXXXXX

"Nah, baby," Charlie had hoped he sounded reassuring. "I'm really workin' on something big! And when I get back...".

"I know, I know," Charmaine'd said, "you'll shower me with diamonds and furs!"

"You know I will, doll," her husband had promised her, making a kissing noise as he hung up.

XXXXXXXXXXXX

In the present, Charlie adjusted his hat and pulled down his coat jacket. He wanted to make sure nothing went wrong with his wife. Placing his change into the pay phone, Charlie hurriedly dialed Charmaine's number. He could hear the gentle breeze rustling the leaves on the trees in the background where he was.

After the phone rang three times, a male voice answered, "Hello?"

Charlie nearly dropped the phone, but he told himself he had nothing to worry about; after all, Charmaine could have moved.

Forcing himself to be neutral, he asked, "Is this Charmaine Leach's phone number?"

"Thomas," the man answered with his velvety smooth voice. "Her name is Charmaine Thomas. Who is this?"

Now Leach was angry. He said, point blank into the receiver, "this is her husband. Who are _you?"_

"Oh...the louse," the man said. "Well, my wife doesn't want to see you or hear from you ever again, and _furthermore..."._

The man stopped talking as a brunette haired Charmaine pulled the receiver out of his hand, saying, "Charlie, is that _you?_"

"Yeah, Charmaine, I'm back, and I'm better than ever!" Charlie lied. "So, how's about comin' back to your old man, eh?"

Charmaine snapped, "Come back? After you left me high and dry for two years!? Nothing doin'. I got an annulment since we ain't never done anything in the kid department and it's perfectly legal. Me and Dick are happy! So why don't you leave us alone?"

Charlie was livid as he considered the love of his life and her "abandonment" of him. He knew he had little to offer his ex wife. But then he smiled.

"You're right," he told his former spouse. "I have bigger fish to fry. In fact, I don't even know why I bothered with you. Who needs you when I can have any girls I want, along with gold an' jewelry? You have a nice life. I'm getting a nice, fat pigeon."

"Suit yourself!" Shouted Charmaine as she hung up the phone. Charlie angrily stepped out of the phone booth.

He stuck his tongue out at the phone and thought, _who needs 'er? I can get someone just like __**that! **__All I need's my friend and her mojo! I'll make the witch turn my new wife into the __**perfect**__ wife: obedient, and all mine! And __**that**__ loser will be a parrot!_

Leach looked around at the various people walking around again and reasoned that he was somewhere near the witch's town.

"'Scuse me…" he said to an older woman who looked like she was sixty. She gave him a cursory look and stopped walking.

"Yes?" She asked, adjusting her chinchilla wrap around her tweed coated, heavy set frame.

"Can you tell me which town I'm in, doll?" He asked.

The woman paid his 'doll' remark no mind. She replied, "You don't know where you are?" Pointing to a newspaper, she said, "Amherst, Connecticut." Charlie looked at an old fashioned newspaper dispenser and saw the title _The Amherst Gazette._

Charlie asked, "How far is that from Westport?"

The old lady said, "Less than twenty minutes away. Go North on highway 11."

As she walked off, Charlie grinned, thinking, _I'll just __**do **__that, and then I'll pay Madame Pigeon a visit!_

Going back into the booth, Leach grabbed a phone book and flipped to the page with the name Stevens on it. He was rewarded with the sixth name out of the twenty four he saw.

"D. and S. Stevens, 1164 Morning Glory Cir., Westport," he read. "Isn't that grand? She stayed there so that we could get together!"

His search complete, he walked to the center of the small town and found the train station. Getting a ticket, Charlie waited for the train to take him to Westport, his happiness growing.

XXXXXXXXXX

Meanwhile, at the Stephens' house, Darrin kissed Samantha as she handed him his briefcase. "Bye, Sam," the dark haired executive of McMann and Tate said. "Have a good day, and no hokus pokus, okay?"

After Samantha was finished kissing her mortal husband, she asked, "Bye Sweetheart. Don't you get tired of telling me that? I think I've done very well in the four years we've been married."

Once he got the door open, Darrin paused, commenting, "Well...yes, you've done okay, but sometimes I've caught you, like that business with the grass last week and the pancakes the week before."

Samantha frowned, saying, "Oh, Darrin! You know I had nothing to do with that! That was all a mix up with the artificial lawn service, and I thought we'd apologized to each other about that. And the pancakes were just..." Samantha paused as she found the right words, "an unfortunate accident."

Darrin thought about Samantha's comment. He sighed, finally agreeing with what she said. That was a low blow, he realized, to bring up incidents that really weren't her fault, and she _was _trying. He certainly liked things the way they were, and he hated seeing her unhappy.

Kissing her again, he said, "You're right, Sweetheart. I shouldn't have accused you without cause. And, to make it up to you, I am suspending your, uh, sentence. You can use your powers for this one day, except around other people!"

Before Samantha could answer, Endora, Darrin's holy-terror-of-a-mother-in-law popped in. "If I were you, I'd take What's-his-name up on that!"

Exasperated, Samantha said, "Mother, you know his name is Darrin."

Endora turned her heavily made up eyes on her son-in-law, saying, "Oh yes...Darius! Now, what were you saying to my daughter?"

"I was saying..." Darrin started to tell Endora; then, he thought better of it, finally telling the older witch, "Not even you can bother me today." To Samantha, he said, "I'm going to be late to the office." He went out his front door, briefcase in hand. Samantha regarded her mother with a critical eye.

"All right, Mother, since you've driven away my husband, I'll have to tell you what's going on," the blond witch said.

"I want to hear the details behind what's his name's defection," Endora said. "What did I do besides bruise his ego a bit?"

Samantha crossed her arms, saying, "You did nothing of the kind. Darrin's just late, that's all." Endora folded her arms and laughed. Before she could comment, Samantha requested, "Since he did apologize, though, and since he _did _say I could use my powers today, promise me you'll leave him alone, at least for the next twenty four hours."

Endora started to say something; then, she thought better of it, and finally agreed. "Very well, Samantha." Touching her fingers on both sides of her nose, Endora promised, "Witches' honor. I promise not to bother Dumb Dumb for today."

XXXXXXXXXX

While Samantha and her mother were talking, Gladys Kravitz snuck up to her vantage point at the front window of the Steven's house.

XXXXXXXXXX

Samantha started to correct her mother, but then Endora disappeared. "Good," Samantha said with a touch of satisfaction.

XXXXXXXXXX

Meanwhile, Gladys, upon seeing Endora vanish, ran back home, screaming, "Abner! ABNER!"

Abner Kravitz looked at his wife after lowering his newspaper with the bored expression of someone who'd been down the road she took him on daily so many times.

"What, Gladys?" He asked tiredly.

"Mrs. Steven's mother was there and then poof! She disappeared!" Gladys said.

Abner sat up and reached for a bottle on the nightstand beside his couch. "Take your medicine, Gladys," he urged, holding it out to her.

"I don't _need _medicine…I just need you to support me!" Gladys wailed.

Abner's response was, "I'll support you when you start making sense!"

"Abner, I'm not crazy," Gladys insisted. "And, I'll prove it to you one day!" When Gladys walked off, Abner took a swig of her medicine.

XXXXXXXXXXXXX

Samantha turned on the TV set, having finished her housework and having let Tabitha go with Aunt Enchantra for the day. She positioned herself on her couch.

XXXXXXXXXXXXX

As Samantha was watching her favorite sitcom, her phone rang. She went over to the table by the steps leading to the bedrooms upstairs and picked up the receiver.

"Hello?" she asked. When no one answered, she asked again, "Hello?"

XXXXXXXXXXXX

On the Westport station's only pay phone, Charlie disguised his voice, hoping that she wouldn't recognize him. "Wrong number," he said with an Indian sounding accent. When he heard his mark hang up, the former private eye smiled an evil grin.

XXXXXXXXXXXX

Samantha shrugged and went back to watch her program.

XXXXXXXXXXXX

Charlie could hardly believe his good fortune! He said to himself, "Boy, I must have a lucky star somewhere! My pigeon is right where I want her. Now to walk to where she is, and her double-crossing husband!"

XXXXXXXXXXXX

After her program ended, Samantha turned off the television and started basting a ham she was going to cook for a couple of hours for Darrin's supper. She had just put the cloves in by witchcraft and levitated the broiling pan toward the stove while opening the refrigerator to get some sweet potatoes out to place on the counter for peeling when the doorbell rang.

The blonde witch went to open it, wondering who would be calling since she wasn't expecting anyone. She opened the door to find her wide eyed, gruff looking nemesis on the other side.

"You again!" Samantha exclaimed, exasperated.

Charlie removed his fedora to expose some slightly graying hair. "In the flesh!" He said. "Miss me?"

Samantha said, "Hardly." She started to waive her arm to send him somewhere and said, "I won't this time."

Charlie's next words caused her to temporarily hesitate. "How would your husband feel about you doin' magic, even if it was to do something to me?"

Samantha smiled, saying, "I have a pardon. I can use my powers. How would you like an all- expense paid trip to Istanbul?"

Charlie wasn't phased. "I thought about that. You, sending me places. But, see, lady," he said. "Even if you do, even if it takes the rest of my life, I will get back from wherever I end up and I'll keep comin' back until you give me what I want!"

"So, you'll keep bothering my happy household until I do something, hmm?" Samantha queried.

"You know it, Sweetcakes," Charlie said.

Samantha considered his words. She couldn't just turn him into something permanently; that would be unethical, and she wouldn't stoop to his level. She could send him somewhere, but even if it took years, he was just the type of person to bother her again.

What could she do, unless….Samantha's eyes lit up as she seized on a plan. It would be a dirty trick to play on him somewhat, but he asked for it.

Crossing her hands behind her, she casually remarked as she gestured out of his line of vision, "I guess I'll have to do what you say, then."

Charlie nodded, saying, "Darn tootin'."

Suddenly, Samantha's phone rang. "Excuse me," she told Charlie. Picking her receiver up, Samantha heard her friend in Florida's voice: "Hello?"

"Boy, am I glad I got you," Samantha said. "Do you think you could do me a great favor?"

XXXXXXXXXXXXXX

On the phone in Cocoa Beach, Jeannie said, "It would be a pleasure." Hearing Samantha's plan, Jeannie said, "Are you sure…?"

Samantha said, "Yes, I am."

XXXXXXXXXXXXX

"All right," Jeannie said. She heard Samantha say to Leach that his wish would be granted, and then she blinked.

Right on cue, Major Nelson came downstairs, buttoning his jacket and asking for his coffee.

Jeannie blinked it in as Tony asked who she was talking to.

"Oh, a friend in Connecticut," she said, smiling. "She told me about a pest problem she was having and I helped her out."

"Jeannie…" Tony said warningly. "You didn't get her in trouble, did you?"

"No, Master," Jeannie said. "I just gave her some…minor assistance."

"Ohhh…" Tony said, drinking his coffee. He started asking more questions and then thinking that some things were better left in the dark, settled down to read the paper. Jeannie told herself this was one time her lie was the best thing to tell her Master. She certainly wasn't going to tell him where she'd sent Mr. Leach.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Jeannie's sister had really messed things up this time! Not only had she not secured Major Anthony Nelson as her pet, but she was stuck in her bottle until her Master released her.

That would probably take days, if not weeks, since he knew what a bad genie she was. When Jeannie II was out, she gave him what he wanted, but she also escaped and did what _she _wanted. His servants, his friends, even his family, which tended to be amiable and harbor no ill will toward anyone, steered well clear of his genie.

If he didn't want certain things in his life that only she could give him, he would have let her go years ago.

He pushed the lid down sealing her bottle good and tight. "Stay in there for a year or two, why do you not?" He said, stomping out of his tent, his robes billowing out behind him.

Jeannie II was dejected. She was so very lonely and she wondered how she could escape when someone materialized inside her bottle.

Charlie looked at the pink, round couch and the red jewels inside on walls which contained an iridescent material. He saw yellow and green pillows shaped like flowers on the furniture and wondered where he was.

"What the…?" He asked. Then, he saw a woman wearing a green harem outfit with a flowing skirt, which had different shades of green in its diaphanous material. Her black ponytail, coming out of a tall hat, was medium length. She was quite pretty and had blue eye shadow above her striking blue orbs. She also walked around him as though she owned him.

"Where did you come from, pet?" Jeannie's sister asked, her mind wrapping around the fact that she now had a hobby.

"That witch!" Charlie shouted. "She did this to me! Wait'll I get my hands on her!" His hands curled into fists.

"Oh, I wouldn't worry about that," Jeannie's sister said, blinking as she finished, "pet."

Charlie vanished, but in his place was a small, grey cat with dark eyes, its fur scruffy and sticking out every which way. Jeannie II picked him up.

"Much better, much better!" She said. When he meowed his displeasure, Jeannie's sister said, "Don't worry, pet. I'll change you back…someday. But, as long as you were given to me, I should play with you, don't you think?"

He continued to meow, but she laughed and gave him some yarn to play with. This mortal was no Anthony Nelson, but he'd do until someone better came along, or she was released.

XXXXXXXXXXXXX

Darrin let himself in not too much later than he'd left that morning. "Samantha!" He called.

His wife came in from the kitchen wiping her hands on her apron. "Darrin!" She greeted. "What a surprise!"

"Larry told me to come home and work on the Wibbly Toys account," Darrin said, going toward his study. "How was your day?"

Samantha said, "Oh, mostly uneventful. Tabitha should be back soon and the only visitor other than Mother and Aunt Enchantra was a salesman."

"Oh?" Darrin said as he hung up his jacket in the hall closet. "Pushy, I suppose."

"Yes, he was, but I don't think he'll be by again," Samantha said, kissing her husband. She thought about getting Jeannie's help in dealing with Charlie Leach since she'd run out of ideas, at least temporarily, for getting him to stop bothering her.

She knew she would get him out of his predicament with Jeannie's sister. After all, she didn't want him to be on the receiving end of her sometimes evil magic spells forever. But after a day or two of being her guest, Samantha was sure that Leach could learn his lesson.

She watched Darrin go into the study and went back into the kitchen to finish making dinner.

THE END


End file.
